Friday, November 28, 2008

The: And Nothing More, Challenge

For some reason, this picture touches my heart...................and nothing more.

Whenever someone walks past me I will think to myself there is someone walking past me, and nothing more.
If an old lady walks past me and fiddles in her pocket as she goes. I will think there is an old lady fiddling in her pockets as she walks, and nothing more.
If a fat man waddles past me and looks me in the eye for two seconds I will think there is a fat man waddling by whilst looking me breifly in the eye, and nothing more.
If two little kids walk past and one whispers something to the other and then they both chuckle, I will think there is two kids laughing at something and nothing more.
If I see a store with a sign saying: 50% of everything!, I will think there is a store with a 50% sale, and nothing more.
If I see A teenage girl trip slightly on her feet and then continue walking I will think there is a young girl who almost tripped, and nothing more.
If I see a rundown dairy painted pink, I will think there is a ugly dairy painted pink, and nothing more.
If I see a discarded ciggerette butt. I will think there is a discarded ciggerette butt, and nothing more.
This way I am training myself to not instantly assume every negative action a person has is because of me, or directed at me. I am training my mind to realise that I never know the story behind why a rundown dairy has been painted freshly pink, or a ciggerette butt was discarded on the ground. Or even what will happen to all the discounted things in the 50% off sale. I just do not know for certain untill I have encountered every little bit of the story with my own ears and eyes.
By applying the "and nothing more" concept to ordinary objects as well as people I am showing my mind that I do no know for certain why anything, or anyone, has become like it is.
If someone appears to be giving me the "evil eyes" I will simply think, that person is making an unhappy look in my direction. However That does not mean they are intending to give me the evils because they think i'm ugly/snobby/retarded/dumb/insecure/mean/fat/etc...... I am simply seeing what I see and nothing more.
And just like I do not know if all the products in the big sale will sell out, I do not know if some stranger walking past me will think poorly of me.
And if they are thinking rationally the stranger should also be at terms with the fact that they do not know if i am thinking poorly of them, or even thinking of them at all. Also, they CAN NOT tell from a several seconds glance whether I am a dickhead or not. Case in point: Focus on what other people in the world could be thinking of you and you will remain depressed AND ignorant.
Focus On the fact that they are simply doing what they are doing, and nothing more, and you will remain non self-obssesive, and down-to-earth.
I will also feel more wonder at the world. And we all know those with a burning curiosity discover more and learn more.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Poetry that rhymes can be good

Ever since I was small teachers have told me if my poem rhymes it's never any good. Did they ever bother to even read the words? Anyway my favourite poet ever is Thomas Hood. No that I know much poets but when I came across this poem in my favourite authors book (Virginia Andrews). I felt an instant connection.

Farewell, Life! my senses swim,
And the world is growing' dim;
Thronging shadows cloud the light,
lake the advent of the night, —
Colder, colder, colder still,
Upward steals a vapour chill;
Strong the earthly odour grows, —
I smell the mould above the Rose!
"Welcome, Life! the spirit strives,
Strength returns and hope revives;
Cloudy fears and shapes fornlorn
Fly like shadows of the morn —
O'er the earth there comes a bloom, —
Sunny light for sullen gloom,
Warm perfume for vapours cold, —
I smell the Eose above the mould:"

Upon searching his name I found this poem which applies to the slave labour situation that still exists.

WITH fingers weary and worn,
With eyelids heavy and red,
A woman sat, in unwomanly rags,
Plying her needle and thread--
Stitch! stitch! stitch!
In poverty, hunger, and dirt,
And still with a voice of dolorous pitch
She sang the "Song of the Shirt."
"Work! work! work!
While the cock is crowing aloof!
And work--work--work,
Till the stars shine through the roof!
It's Oh! to be a slave
Along with the barbarous Turk,
Where woman has never a soul to save,
If this is Christian work!
Till the brain begins to swim;
Till the eyes are heavy and dim!
Seam, and gusset, and band,
Band, and gusset, and seam,
Till over the buttons I fall asleep,
And sew them on in a dream!
"Oh, Men, with Sisters dear!
Oh, men, with Mothers and Wives!
It is not linen you're wearing out,
But human creatures' lives!
In poverty, hunger and dirt,
Sewing at once, with a double thread,
A Shroud as well as a Shirt.
"But why do I talk of Death?
That Phantom of grisly bone,
I hardly fear its terrible shape,
It seems so like my own--It seems so like my own,
Because of the fasts I keep;
Oh, God! that bread should be so dear,
And flesh and blood so cheap!
My labour never flags;
And what are its wages? A bed of straw,
A crust of bread--and rags.
That shatter'd roof--and this naked floor--
A table--a broken chair--
And a wall so blank, my shadow I thank
For sometimes falling there!
From weary chime to chime,
Work--work--work--As prisoners work for crime!
Band, and gusset, and seam,
Seam, and gusset, and band,
Till the heart is sick, and the brain benumb'd.
As well as the weary hand.
In the dull December light,
And work--work--work,
When the weather is warm and bright--
While underneath the eaves
The brooding swallows cling
As if to show me their sunny backs
And twit me with the spring.
"Oh! but to breathe the breath
Of the cowslip and primrose sweet--
With the sky above my head,And the grass beneath my feet,
For only one short hour
To feel as I used to feel,
Before I knew the woes of want
And the walk that costs a meal!
"Oh! but for one short hour!
A respite however brief!
No blessed leisure for Love or Hope,
But only time for Grief!
A little weeping would ease my heart,
But in their briny bed
My tears must stop, for every drop
Hinders needle and thread!"
With fingers weary and worn,
With eyelids heavy and red,
A woman sat in unwomanly rags,
Plying her needle and thread--
Stitch! stitch! stitch!
In poverty, hunger, and dirt,
And still with a voice of dolorous pitch,--
Would that its tone could reach the Rich!--
She sang this "Song of the Shirt!"

*Tear*, Did you cry? Or did you cry?

Celebritys I Actually Like

○ Miranda Kerr

She is too cute

○ Emma Watson
She always looks good

○ Lily Allen

Unlike Emma she doesn't always look good, but she never looks pretentious

○ Mary-Kate Olsen

The Queen Of the Bag-Lady style

○ Natalia Vodianova
She is so beautiful, I think her looks peaked after her pregnancy
○Dakota Fanning
Her personality is so sweet in interviews, I hope she doesn't get to arrogant and become a diva

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Revalation of The Day

Smile, even when you don't feel happy (espcially when you don't feel happy), your body believes in the expression your making, and releases happy endorphins into the body to match your smile. I learnt today that it's hard not to feel a surge of happiness, when you are smiling. Even if it is a fake one. People also gravitate towards those who smile more, because even a fake one shows friendliness, compassion, and makes you not appear so intimidating. It's easier to love yourself when your smiling because suddenly you notice everything that could be making you smile, and then you begin to feel a genuine smile overtaking the fake one. Faking a smile does not make you uncool, in fact you will feel more at peace with yourself for being humble.

In the words of Ben Folds

"Smile like you've got nothing to prove
No matter what you might do
There's always someone out there
Cooler than you
I know that's hard to believe
But there are people you meet
They're into something That is to big to be expressed
Through their clothes
And they'll put upWith all the poses you throw
And you won't even know
That they're not sizing you up
They know your ma fucked you up
Or maybe let you watch
Too much TV
But they'll still look in your eyes
To find the human inside
You know there's always something
In there to see
Beneath the veneer
Not everybody made the list this year
Have a beer
Make me feel tiny
If it makes you feel tall
But there's always someone
Cooler than you
Yeah, you're the shit
But you won't be it for long
Oh there's always someone
Cooler than you
Yeah, there's always someone
Cooler than you
Now that I've got the disease
In a way I'm relieved'
Cause I don't have to stress about it
Like you do
I might just get up and dance
Or buy some acid-washed pants
When you don't care
Then you've got nothing to lose
And I won't hesitate'
Cause every moment
Life is slipping away
Make me feel tiny
If it makes you feel tall
But there's always someone
Cooler than you
Yeah, you're the shit
But you won't be it for long
Oh there's always someone
Cooler than you
Yeah, there's always someone
Cooler than you
Oh, there's always someone Cooler than...
Life is wonderful
Life is beautiful
We're all children of
One big universe
So you don't have to be
A chump
And you know(You know)
That I won't(I won't)
Cause every moment Life is slipping away(Away)
It's okay(It's okay)
Make me feel tiny
If it makes you feel tall
Oh, 'cause there's always someone
Cooler than you
Yeah, you're the shit
But you won't be it for long
But there's always someone
Cooler than you
Oh yeah, there's always someone
Cooler than you
Because there's always someone
Cooler than you
Cooler than you
Nerds go wild...

Monday, November 3, 2008

The Turn of Time when I Try Things I love Tuesday

•○•The reason Why I love Susie from Style Bubble.

"I KNOW that if I rolled up my Lanvin blazer sleeves, donned some cut-off denim shorts, black opaques, my Balenciaga-knock off boots and an AA tee, people would remark that I looked half-decent and vaguely dare I say chic? I've come to realise that the cliches about fashion conformity don't exist for no good reason. Originality is encouraged but god forbid if you don't worship at Christopher Decarnin's feet, think Carine Roitfeld is elegant amd that the Olsen twins are effing cool and want Alexander Wang to be your gay best friend, then you can just F right off and hide in a fashion cave, banished forever into the realms of un-cool and downright dorky."

She is always so genuine, and down to earth just at the right time. Just when you think people are about to get away with fucking her or someone else over, she points out the well-needed truth and hits all the points.

•○• The lyrics in Westlife's new song

•○• This Airy-Fairy-like Dress

•○• My New Job at the Supermarket as a person who runs around stacking the shelves. It sounds like hard work.....And it is! But that's a good thing because I'm getting a fit toned body I have always dreamed of, and the excersise is helping alleviate my depression.

•○• Making prank-calls with my friends using this free Dr Phil Soundboard

•○• Making up my own quotes. "Before you finalize any of your creations (drawings, writing, designs, or otherwise) Make sure that you were not trying to be anything other then yourself, or an improved version of yourself. People can always see when you have created something for the sheer sake of giving of a certain preconcieved image. But when you genuinelly feel that you absolutely must do what you have done, and genuinely fear what others will think of this genuine side of YOU - that is about to be shown through your creation, that is when you know you have created something beautiful." ~ Me

•○• Improving this blog when I had a dreadful feeling of impending doom. Don't worry my blog is going somewhere now. I'm making it helpful inspiring, and genuine so people can relate to me with ease.

My Revalations

As time goes on, I will learn new things, and obviously that means the writing in my blog will change. It will on some days maybe seem like I am a different person then I was yesterday. This is because I change my thinking patterns quickly, and one simple change in one of my thoughts can change the whole basis of my judgement on life and everyone in it. Obviously everyone does this, but I am pointing this out so readers (*cough* what readers?! *cough*) know, that although some days I may seem like an ignorant dick-ead trying to act really cool. On other days
I actually am the opposite of said dick-ead. And am able to simply relax into myself.
Here's some more life-related of my recent revelations.

*I must record my goals, failures, successes, and revelations in order to progress regularly in life.
*The reason I thought I was "lonely" for a boyfriend, was only because I was insecure about myself and simply needed a guy to validate my self-worth.
*When I am doing anything nice for someone, I should be doing it only to give to the other person and make them happy. NEVER should I be simply doing it so I can in turn get something from the other person. E.G, their love, gifts, compliments or anything else that can be given.
I must learn to love without relying on getting something in return to be happy.
*Un-processed food = love of self, and more intense pleasurable feelings when eating something yummy.
*To become soemthing amazing I must only think of amazing people and things, and only focus on sad people and things when I intend to help the person or situation.
*To be able to genuinely laugh from the very pit of my heart and soul,
I must first learn to laugh at myself, without the laughter feeling forced.
*I must be always reading self-help articles, books, and blogs. I can never get enough information.
*I must never let my emotions be negatively affected by someone who appears better of then me, and is judging/ putting down an aspect of my attitude to life. Regardless of their popularity level they could still be just another George Bush - A person well-off because the enviroment around them was supportive. Remember there is a whole world of different people out there, and a whole other world inside of you.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

blah blah, poetry again

I am confused
a twist of turns
a mirage of laughter among the burns
a orchestra whith too much playing
a set of laws with too much staying
a person who cannot interact
for to speak would break her unconcious contract

The Golden Frame

A time has come that was not due
I am not the me I thought I knew
not the fairy child that lurked my dreams
but Magdelena, yes it seems .................

To remain a statue all of gold
or breathe in the life which has me sold
I chose to leave my safe warm shell
which kept me seen as whole and well
I chose to part with the golden frame
I am the painting, Alannah the name
But now I wonder what is next?
how do I shed the canvas, the life that intersects

my history now dragged along
weaved inside for far too long
must be cut from my time
there's too much pieces intertwined

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